Hindsight, a prose poem

Dream Thelma
©2016 by Jack A. Urquhart

“I can see you,” she says
sweeping airily by,
flash of Sunday-school dotted swiss,
patent leather rat-a-tat heels,
whiff of Skin So Soft.
“Time to rise and shine!”
Her voice is soprano sharp
and bellwether clear,
the vibrato not yet crackled with age.
“Mama seeees you very well.”
And how eagerly, happily you rouse,
clutch at the bed sheets,
a child again to your mother’s skirts.
“And I can see you,” you answer back.
But, that truth is fading fast,
like the epiphanies of slumber,
another vision glimpsed much too late.
And come the hindsight of day,
subject to wavering revision.

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Not on Your Life: a prose poem

©2016 by Jack A. UrquhartNot on Your Life-2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We said our farewells in Seattle;
You, heading off to the library in a misting rain,
I, preoccupied with transit arrangements, flight delays.
But I remember the smoky scent of your body
and how thin your shoulders
in our last shivering embrace.

Don’t look back, I told myself, as I walked away—
not on your life, or be stricken helpless,
all steely resolve reduced to salt and tears.
Don’t look back if you can help it.

But, of course, I couldn’t. Not on your life.

You were standing at the top of the hill, the first time I turned,
your shoulders stooped, trousers drooping in denim pools.
My glasses had fogged, but I saw that you’d turned as well,
and how graceful your mittened hands in flight—
like mourning doves—when you waved goodbye.

I wish you could know how beautiful I thought you then—
like a watercolor come to life; a wonder wrought by an artist,
a being more deserving of your existence than I;
and yet, even at that distance, there it was—
the echo of my face cast back at me from yours.

It couldn’t have been more than seconds
before I turned the second time.
But you were already gone, lost in the Seattle mists.

Was it negligent of me—so eager to be on my way—
not to have recognized it then: a matter of life and death?
Was it unforgivable not to have fathomed the truth:
that I had only that one opening—to call you back,
that last chance to call you home?
Is that too much to ask, I wonder?
Too much to stand, perhaps,
of one poor benighted father?

Probably not.

Not on your life.

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Sunday Morning Run (prose poem)

EarlymorningRun-2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

©2015 by Jack A. Urquhart

Come Sunday morning,
he runs the streets,
pants and puffs past houses
familiar since kindergarten,
the former homes
of former friends.
Instead of Sunday School,
he attends the alleyways,
side-steps puddles behind the VFW,
its parking lot redolent
of the last Supper:
barbecue and corn on the cob,
stale beer, soured potato salad.
Come the Sabbath,
instead of hosannas,
he raises a dust,
sprints the bricked streets,
those WPA relics
of his Grandfather’s time,
moldy as Methuselah.
In lieu of Jee-suz,
he follows a sweaty pace,
celebrates human sacrifice
in his own slogging way,
conscious that every year
makes him slower,
every stride closer
to the finish line.
And yet…
from now until then,
there are watercolor sunrises
and Cinderella moons,
silver-slippered
on the steps of dawn;
there are humid mornings
dank as high school locker rooms,
and cocks and crows in the city park.
All this, even if there is no point,
nor hope of understanding,
nothing that can decode
the mystery of a beating heart,
or what spins stars, planets
and human beings ad infinitum
into the vastness of space.
Nevertheless…
Come Sunday morning,
he runs the streets,
senses tuned to the divine
against the off-chance
of a sudden revelation.

 

 

 

 

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Shelter

raindrops on wire-1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

©2015 by Jack A. Urquhart
(for Raymond)

Purple thunder heralds the storm.
At dusk, the rains begin.
Outside my window a necklace of liquid pearls—
strung from telephone line—
captures the last iridescence of day.
I hear a mourning dove fluster and take flight;
her cry is heathery, a fluttering gray.
At my desk, I search for words.
Is there a better likeness of longing?
In the next room, I hear you speak.
Once, then again softly
you call my name
and I rise
To seek shelter

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Recollections

BluePurse-3A

©2015 by Jack A. Urquhart
(for Mom)

Big blue Buick lies wrecked
by the road—plate glass, framed steel
fragile as October leaves—
as fleeting as flesh and bone;

Still a blue leather purse
left behind at the scene
calls back its mistress
from perfume scented seams.

 

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Space (a prose poem)

Son and Earth-2


©2015 by Jack A. Urquhart
(for Dillon from Dad)

I dreamt of us again last night:
You, sullen and scowling,
opting for deep space;
Me, drawn to your furtive luster,
wondering how, from where we began,
we’d opened this gravity-bound distance—
supernal son and earth-bound father,
lovelorn and locked
in opposing orbits,
forever pushing and pulling,
pushing and pulling each other.
Never breaking apart.
Never making contact.

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Haiku for Dillon

Blue SpruceHaiku for Dillon
Lost two years ago today
Alive in my heart

Blue spruce ‘neath March snow
Bends to heavy summer rains
Too soon the bough breaks

 

 

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Book Review: Kate Atkinson’s “Life After Life” and “A God in Ruins”

©2015 by Jack A. Urquhart   (Twitter @EvryManJac)         1580 words

When we read a story, we inhabit it. The covers of the book are like a roof and four walls. What is to happen next will take place within the four walls of the story. And this is possible because the story’s voice makes everything its own.
John Berger (b. 1926), British author and critic

I don’t particularly enjoy writing book reviews. What can one reader—let alone one functioning as an obscure blogger—say to another that is likely to influence his or her reading experience? Book reviews—even the most intelligent—generally boil down to opinion, which, as the saying goes, is the cheapest commodity in the world. And yet, I can’t help thinking that occasionally some books, and some authors, deserve a shout out from ordinary readers like me, book junkies who, unlike professional critics, do not receive comp copies (and are not remunerated for their time and efforts) and thus, have a real investment in the work they praise or pan.

I believe that Kate Atkinson is a writer who deserves as much praise as she can get; likewise, her latest novel, A God in Ruins, and its predecessor, Life After Life. Both novels present the reader with such an engaging, well-constructed—and challenging—literary abode that it is difficult to vacate the premises on the last page.

That said, I should confess that prior to a recent NPR piece featuring Gone Girl author Gillian Flynn’s enthusiastic take on A God in Ruins, I had never heard of Kate Atkinson. I expect that is because I do not often read detective stories, which, prior to the novels that are the subject of this review, had been Atkinson’s oeuvre. Indeed, I have since learned that her “Case Histories” mystery series, featuring Detective Jackson Brodie, has long been a worldwide best seller.

I suppose, then, it is understandable that some critics have deemed Life After Life and A God in Ruins dramatic authorial departures. However, to my mind, there is something of the sleuth’s energy in both of these works. That is because in both novels, Atkinson weaves a mystery—the mystery of what shapes a human life. In Life After Lifeand to a lesser extent in A God in Ruinsmetafiction is the literary device employed (and even manipulated) in scattering a trail of clues for readers to follow.

Screen Shot 2015-06-10 at 7.50.18 PMLife After Life
Atkinson’s protagonist in Life After Life (Little, Brown and Company, 2013) is Ursula Todd, the product of a rather ordinary upper middle class British family, circa early 20th Century. But there is nothing ordinary about Ursula’s life, and that is because Atkinson has given her more than one—more than one life, that is.

In fact, Ursula is given multiple contingent lives and destinies, each set in motion by happenstance or a sometimes seemingly offhand choice. The reasons for employing this literary device are surely open to debate. One might wonder, for instance, if Atkinson means to evoke the contingent nature of evolution (à la Stephen Jay Gould?) in creating Ursula’s many lives. Whatever her actual reason(s), it seems to me that Atkinson is content for her readers to sleuth out for themselves the meaningful summation of Ursula’s multiple incarnations.

A few examples: In an early chapter set in 1910, Ursula Todd is stillborn, the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck; and yet, in a subsequent chapter, the family doctor arrives in time to cut the cord and grant Ursula a chance at life. In another chapter, Ursula is dispatched by drowning; in still another, “darkness falls” when she plummets from a rooftop. Indeed, Atkinson displays considerable imagination in killing off her protagonist. Influenza, an abusive husband, suicide, and the WWII Blitz bombing of London, among others, are called into play. This, then, is the novel’s format, with Ursula dying only to be reborn to an alternate destiny—a destiny often determined by the smallest detail: the presence or absence of a pair of scissors or a pet dog, a chance encounter that happens or doesn’t, the choice to walk alone or with a companion.

In the hands of a less gifted writer, this strategy could prove tedious, even alienating. Yet Atkinson pulls it off (life after life) by constructing a completely believable, and more importantly, engaging space for the reader to inhabit—four walls and a roof, if you will, within the confines of which it is easy to keep suspending disbelief. The wonder of Atkinson’s talent is that she is able to maintain this suspension even when she (repeatedly) tears down walls to expose the artifice of her creations.

But what does it all mean?
Inevitably, the bag of clues collected in living with Ursula through each incarnation provides enough evidence to suggest an answer to the mystery Atkinson poses—i.e., how is a human life, any human life and destiny—shaped? To my mind, the obvious conclusion would seem that our destinies hang on the thread of our collective individual choices—that we are all participants in a kind of cosmic game show. A show that requires us to self-select from doors A, B, C, ad infinitum, and that guarantees, as it does for Ursula, that we will be shaped by the prize or disappointment of each choice. Not exactly a rocket science notion, I’ll grant. But as with so many works of art, it is the artist’s method, her process and technique, that makes the masterwork—not necessarily the message conveyed. So it is with Atkinson’s wonderful Life After Life.

Screen Shot 2015-06-10 at 7.50.55 PMA God in Ruins
This reader couldn’t help but regard Atkinson’s most recent novel as a companion piece to its predecessor, Life After Life. Some of the evidence for this conclusion is obvious. For example, in A God in Ruins (Little, Brown and Company, 2015) Atkinson returns to upper middle class WWII British society and the well-to-do Todd family first encountered in Life After Life. This time, however, she resurrects Teddy Todd (Ursula’s brother, killed off in the earlier novel) to be her protagonist.

And yet, I believe there are other reasons to think of the two books as compadres. Both novels play with time; but rather than fashioning multiple lives for her god-in-ruins protagonist (à la Life After Life), Atkinson chooses to alternate between the various eras of Teddy’s one-and-only life. It is a literary strategy akin to moving between the rooms of a house.

Atkinson’s Teddy becomes a WWII RAF pilot responsible for carrying out dozens of bombing missions deep into Hitler’s Germany—missions in which tens, possibly hundreds, of thousands of civilians die. The novel tracks between Teddy’s nightmarish war-time experiences (often rendered in bloodily graphic detail) and his post war life as faithful husband (to wife Nancy), befuddled father (to unlikable daughter Viola), doting grandfather (to Bertie and Sunny), and decidedly unambitious small-town journalist. What is remarkable about the various ‘rooms’ of Teddy’s life—each of which the reader visits in separate but adjacent chapters—is that Atkinson sees to it that her ultimately passive, almost overly virtuous protagonist inhabits a space that the reader wants to share.

Again, for this reader, there is something of the mystery writer’s magic in this—skills that Atkinson surely honed via her previous detective novels. Why, for example, the curious reader may begin to wonder, does Teddy—whose WWII life was marked by adventures of the most bellicose variety—opt in his post war years for a life of quiet passivity? Why does he seem inclined to settle quietly into an old age home and death? What is behind Teddy’s unwillingness to explore the rooms where his daughter’s open hostility resides?

And speaking of Viola, what mysterious force drives her cruel treatment of Teddy, her blatant dismissal of a man so obviously good—and for that matter, her equally disparaging treatment of Bertie and Sunny, her own children?

Atkinson scatters her clues liberally, sometimes tossing them out (never casually or clumsily) whole chapters in advance. And again, it is left to the reader (as it should be!) to piece together the significance of the stories behind the story—which, as in every great mystery, turns on death.

For this reader, the gist of A God in Ruins boils down to how death—especially death encountered viscerally and in close quarters—impacts and shapes the living. And yes, this is an old trope—one well rehearsed and/or executed in countless works of fiction. But perhaps what makes Atkinson’s treatment so compelling is that she makes death the story within the story—within the story of life, that is.

Nowhere is this made more stunningly and movingly apparent than in the brilliant conclusion to A God in Ruins.

To say too much about how Atkinson manages this would be to spoil the beauty and the thrill of its discovery. It is enough to say that in exploding the walls—and indeed, blowing the roof off—of her creation, the author reveals its shared lineage with Life After Life.

That Atkinson can so thoroughly destroy and then restore the mystery and magic of an extraordinary work of fiction is part of what makes A God in Ruins such a marvelous literary construct. The novel is exactly the kind of place the serious reader (and writer) should want to inhabit—a place where the architecture is as magnificent as the architect’s skill in creating it.

 

 

 

 

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For All I Care, a prose poem

ForAllICarePhoto©2015 by Jack A. Urquhart               

(For Dillon)

In another dream
You return to me,
arms outstretched,
a child again
asking to be held.
The weight of you
against my quickening heart
is like coming home;
all those other lives,
mere shadows,
might have beens,
for all I care.
It is enough to hold you,
enough to cup your head,
its unbroken yolk
beneath a still soft shell,
yet unscrambled.
You are whole again,
son, moon, stars,
the center of everything
for all I care.
You are alive anew,
flushed as a sunrise,
unburdened as a lullaby;
your baby-fresh scent,
a garden of sweet talcum,
soap and spilled milk.
Sultry as a summer day,
your breath, dreamy
against my cheek.
You could drowse
in my arms a lifetime,
sleep safely there for eternity,
For all I care.

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Tinnitus (a prose poem)

© Sangoiri | Dreamstime.com - Tinnitus Photo

© Sangoiri | Dreamstime.com – Tinnitus Photo

©2015 by Jack A. Urquhart
Listen a moment
and you will hear it,
the universal jingle—
electric, crepitating,
omnipresent in your head.
Barely a hearbeat’s respite
before here it comes again—
the tympanic soap opera;
the static Plop, Plop, Fizz, Fizzing
across dissevered nerves.
BAZAAR BOMBER KILLS FORTY!
DETAILS AT SIX!  NOW THIS—
it whoops, wheezes, whistles.
HUGE SALE!
EVERYTHING MUST GO-GO-GO!
The contrapuntal ditty
spans infinite octaves,
and the rest of your life;
boasts a closed-circuit libretto
scrubbed Cleaner than Clean
to Double Your Pleasure:
BUY ONE, GET ONE FREE!
it Snaps, Crackles, Pops.
EVERYTHING MUST GO-GO-GO!
Truly, never was trumpeted
A more Bubblelicious
bla-bla-blathering.
For surely you’ve divined it—
that there is no escaping
the Juicy-Fruity madness,
that you are audience-bound,
Starburst to Starburst
to finite attention;
a peon mortally obliged
to listen, and listen, and listen?

 

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